Have you ever really, really wanted something a lot?

Ever lost something you valued or someone you loved?

Have you ever looked back at any of those disappointments and realized just how lucky you were that that thing did NOT work out? 

I have!  His name was Joel- a tall, handsome, blue-eyed doctor.

I was crazy in love with him, so I thought.  We were both in our 20’s. The connection was so amazing that we just had to be soul mates, I told myself. But, it didn’t work out.

He lived in Ohio. Me in Oklahoma.  He arranged a little weekend meet up in Little Rock, AK. I was so excited to see him!  He picked me up at the airport and after a little sightseeing, we headed out to dinner at a beautiful little restaurant on the river. (He had made reservations!)

Romantic, right?


It was flat-out disappointing.

But, after dinner, things livened up.

“LaRue,” he said, “I have something important to say to you.” (Heart pounding with excitement! “Here it comes“, I thought to myself, “The moment I’ve been waiting for”!)

And then…

“LaRue, I know you keep thinking that someday we are going to be together, but I want you to let you know that that is never going to happen. We are never going to be together”!

Now what happened next was truly life-changing, because what I heard coming out of my mouth shocked me as much as it did him!

Are you ready?

“Well,” I said, “That means if you aren’t the one for me then I’m really in for a treat”!

With his mouth hanging open and with a look of relief on his face he said, “Wow, that was so powerful”!

We were both surprised by my response (although I was pretending not to be surprised). Those words changed my life!

Why did they change my life?

They changed my life because they changed my perspective.

When we change our perspective on something, what we are looking at changes!

The next morning on my flight home I felt as free as a bird flying among the clouds and looking down at the fields below.

Why did I feel so free? I had just lost him, right?

I was finally free because I had let him go. I had let him go in a flash. In a flash, deep within me I KNEW that someone better for me was headed my way.  (Not that there was anything wrong with him, but there was a better fit for me, my soul and my life purpose).

Higher Wisdom can see what we can never see from the human perspective. Higher Wisdom sees the entire picture when we only see what’s in front of us.

Higher Wisdom helps you align your life choices with the path of your Soul instead of the path of the ego.

When we come into alignment with the path of the Soul, it’s the PERFECT PATH. Your path is your reason for being on planet earth.

It happens when we surrender to what’s PERFECT from the perspective of the Soul.  PERFECT is not be what the conscious mind (ego) would call perfect. 

Experts say to set S.M.A.R.T. goals. (SMART stands for Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant and Time-bound.) But the “Time-bound” part can be where the rub comes in because the ego is time-based and the soul is beyond time.

Time-based goals create stress. Isn’t it stressful, and even anxiety producing, to tell yourself that you’re behind schedule? Time-based goals have the tendency to keep us in the past or the future, instead of in the now which is where the power is. Perfect goals feel graceful because you’re not racing against the clock, or the calendar.  With Perfect Goals you are following the promptings of the soul. That’s why PERFECT GOALS are the way to go.

There are times that SMART goals are appropriate, especially when it comes to business or finances. For myself, when I set a financial goal, I set it and then I surrender it back to perfection.

I do it by saying something like this to Higher Power…

This is what I think I want.  If this is in my highest good and is on the path of my soul, I’d be most grateful to have it.

If it’s not, thank you for replacing it with something better. And, help me see the perfection of what is given to me.

I get the power of SMART goals because I understand how logic and specificity works. But, we also have another part of the brain that sees the whole picture instead of just the nitty-gritty details.

What if we used both our left and right brain together as they were designed to be used? We would stun and amaze ourselves. Our conditioning has taught us to value logic over our senses and intuition.

The brain and the mind is designed to be the servant, not the master.

When you ask for the perfect work, the perfect relationship, the perfect amount of money, and the perfect trip, you put the Master in charge- your Soul. Now that you’ve done that, just step back and detach from what the outcome is supposed to look like.

Now lets go back to those Smart Goals vs. Perfect Goals and about being specific.

I must ask you…”What could be more specific than perfect?

That’s specific, don’t you think?

Now, back to that relationship that didn’t work out for me. It really was PERFECT that it didn’t because our life paths are worlds apart. The Universe is so wise and loving!  I’ve heard Byron Katie say that when you don’t get what you want, you’ve just been spared!

What do you think about time-based goals? Are they helpful or impeding?  Drop me a note below and share your perspective!